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What they say: I'm from the government I'm here to help

What they mean: Welcome to my world of tax, dependency and bureaucracy.

"We will not let matters rest" means "When the Reform Treaty comes into effect, we will let matters rest".

The really important thing/The thing to remember is...X

Y is the really important thing but would crucify us so we are erecting a smokescreen.

"We will have a full and thorough public consultation"
"We will kick the issue into the long grass for a few months and then carry out our plans as intended"

"X is now lower/higher than it was in 1997"
"X is now measured in a completely different way to 1997 and is in fact going in the opposite direction "

"Our argument is simple" means "Our argument is made by a simpleton".

Unfortunately this is very closely related to the recent CPS Lexicon so there is likely to be a lot of repetition.

Gordon Brown's favourites:

"We are on the verge of full employment"
(Unemployment is still 1.6 million but we are working on it!)

"More people in work"
(More Polish plumbers are in work)

"Just getting on with the job"
(Losing more data and borrowing more money)

"I'm a conviction politician"
(I'm inviting my long standing friend Maggie around for a meeting of like minds!)

"Any question that a government politician does not wish to answer"
"Well... I'm afraid that's apparently quite a difficult question, but my solution is easy. I'm going to talk for a long time about a subject not in anyway related and pretty soon people will forget about it. I'll remind people that I have a great haircut, and under our administration Britain has had, on average, 15% better weather than before, while crime rates only go up if you don't turn the graph upside down."

"When I say I'm against immigration, it's not because I'm a racist."
"Maybe I'm not, but I'd love all the racists to vote for me."

The neo-conservatives' favourite

"You are anti-semitic"
(You oppose the Iraqi occupation and our policy to attack Iran)

One that I've noticed Our Great Leader uses frequently:

"The question is..."


"I don't like your question so I'm going to ask my own..."

"This is a very complex matter (although they probably incorrectly use issue)"

I am about to lie to you.


You are too stupid to understand.


I have not a clue what I'm banging on about but I'll follow my brief.

"Economic cycle"
"A vague period -- specifically not today -- we're not there yet."

According to Evan Davis on Today (is the BBC beginning to cotton on?):

I think perhaps Gordon Brown, in particular as Chancellor, was thinking that the good years were about to arrive and we were about to get more money coming into the Exchequer and that borrowing would all sort itself out. I think that if we look back we can say "Actually, no, the last few years were particularly strong years, these were years not when the economy was just chugging along at a rather average or sub-average rate, those were the boom and now we have to prepare for the bust."

Probably a lot of us have to now adjust our expectations... to saying "Oh, it wasn’t that the good years were about to arrive, those were the good years and actually the slowdown’s about to arrive and we better change our behaviour accordingly."

"The Golden Rule"

As a rule, when I sell gold, its a good time to buy.

"British Jobs for Britsih Workers."

If I use the B word enough, they will forget I'm Scottish.


The ability to lose the details of millions of people, the talent needed to come up with the worst solution for Northern Rock, Overpaying and grabbing back tax credits......

"Black Wednesday"

What happened when a previous Tory government took my advice on economics.

Copyright, The Goblin King

Dana Milbank is a man.

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