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AFC Bluebirds soar in double demolition

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Hudson Roe is the captain of AFC Bluebirds, a five-a-side team made up of players from across Westminster. The team are proudly sponsored by Conservative Home. Follow them on Twitter.

On the 17 June 1987, the Dusky Seaside Sparrow officially became extinct. 26 years later, the ConHome-sponsored, avian-named, Bluebirds were playing to ensure their own survival and avoid relegation.  Knowing that the Big Name Sponsor was disappointed in the results last week, the team worked to right this and clock up some victories. 

Lining up for the early kick off, any chance of the first team staying in the second division was dependent upon not just winning, but winning by a strong margin and results in other games going our way. The team, fired up by an inspirational speech from the Captain and free Lucozade at Powerleague ultimately did not avoid the drop. However, the match was a one sided affair with the boys in blue dominating the match and scoring ten goals.

Straight from the kick off Bluebirds were all over the opposition with secure defending and overwhelming firepower up front. Holding the defence was the captain, with Dan Hooper and Ed Winfield spending all of the game running; supporting the defence, facilitating the attack, using all the energy a motivational speech and a free power drink can bring.

With the keeper barely being called upon there was nothing to stop a forward rampage. Jimmy McLoughlin, with his partner-in-crime the Roberto Carlos-like Adam Brown in support, led the charge bagging an excellent hat-trick. With quick passing, competitive play and repeated use of their weaker foot, this first class group of players worked to create a symphony of champagne football. Victory was guaranteed with goals subsequently going to every member of the team - a resounding victory.  The team may have been relegated but with performances like that one, the Division Three title beckons.


The second game of the evening saw the second of the two Bluebirds teams. playing in the Premier Division (safe in the knowledge that they were safe from relegation). enter into a full-blooded contest against a team of angry young men.

A core of players having played the earlier game, the team were well prepared for one of the most physical encounters the intrepid bluebirds had ever faced.  Owing to the experience of the team and despite constant provocation, all of the team remained on the pitch for the whole game.  This was not the case for the over-exuberant ‘Goalscoppers’ who had players removed from the field at several points in the game.  Bluebirds are used to finding themselves playing against physically intimidating opponents; never before has it been a batch of hormonal students. 

Despite the antagonism, Bluebirds continued the evening’s tradition of fine, flowing football - Luke Webster and Alex Lancaster providing width and Jack Withrington again performing the role of foundation upon which successful attacks could be built.   Constant buzzing around and running led the team to overwhelm the youthful opponents; displaying passing that would not look out of place in a Guardiola team.  Despite superior possession the match was, in terms of goals scored, a tight affair, never exceeding a two-goal margin.

The Captain pitched in with his first hat trick of the season, including an expertly dispatched left-foot half volley to take the lead in the final few minutes.  This was sadly undone by some awful defending, but the striker, Will McCann, restored the lead with seconds on the clock.

The season may be over, but there is no let-up for the Bluebirds.  Next week is the beginning of the new season (no summer tour, trips to Dubai or pre-season training sessions for us), with only three weeks before the grudge match against Labour's Demon Eyes on July 13.  

Twobirds 10 – 3 Buzzers
Bluebirds 8 – 7 Goalscoppers


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