Browsing through the Scottish Parliament website this morning, I was intrigued to spot a link offering a translation of the web pages into a language called 'Scots'. Unfamiliar with this 'language' - and safe in the knowledge that the people of Scotland read, write and speak in English - I clicked on the link and was provided with a list of links to the following pages:
- Wha are the MSPs an whit can they dae for me?
- Hoo can I hae ma say in the rinnin o Scotland?
- Makkin yer voice heard in the Scottish Pairlament
- Hoo are new laws made?
If you're a Scots speaker and would like to speak to the Scottish Parliament switchboard in your native tongue, I'm afraid you're out luck as, "at present [they] can tak telephone and textphone caws in English and Gaelic juist". Don't be alarmed though, the site does contain the full contact details of the "Memmers o the Scottish Pairlament that has been electit for tae represent ye".
A joke? Certainly. Self-deprecating Scottish satire? Surely. Regardless, I fired off an e-mail to the Parliament's information service just to make sure. Here's the reply:
"Thank you for your enquiry, which was received by the Scottish Parliament Public Information Service.
"The Scottish Parliament works on behalf of all citizens of Scotland and therefore it makes information available in the languages that its people speak. We have publications and text on our website in Scots because the Scottish Parliamentary Corporate Body (SPCB) - the administrative body that oversees the production of information on the Parliament for the public - recognises the historical and cultural arguments for facilitating the use of this language. Scots has been recognised by the UK Government as meeting the definition of a "regional or minority language" set out in the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages.
"With regards to the version of Scots that is used, the Scottish Parliament has a contract with a translation service which was awarded through open competition. The translator in this case explained that, as Scots is a living language which evolves, the Concise Scots Dictionary published by the Scottish National Dictionary Association (1985) was used and, in certain cases, they used their own judgement when providing this translation."
What a ridiculous waste of taxpayers' money.
