The weak Clucking Fist of Chicken Saturday?
The 'Stalinist' control freak who surrounds himself with yes men?
The scheming sulker who plotted constantly against Tony Blair?
The political calculator who nicks Tory ideas and does everything for political advantage?
The untrustworthy guy who broke his promise on the EU Constitution?
The Scot who is denying the English a fair share of the UK's taxes?
The party leader who gets his bills paid by the unions?
Yesterday's man who cannot escape the shadow of Tony Blair and who does not understand today's challenges?
He's probably all of these things but I would suggest that - more than anything else - he's an incompetent waster.
This is the man (building on what I wrote yesterday) who sold gold at the wrong price... crafted the tax credit system that is so riddled with fraud and complexity... is responsible for the £14bn cost over-runs for the NHS supercomputer... has overseen the weakest-growing economy in the English-speaking world and the slippage of Britain down the global competitiveness league table... had to admit that his Government's statistics on immigrant workers were out by 300,000... so underfunded the prison service that hundreds of foreign prisoners were released wrongly...
You get the idea. If we get a 'Brown Is The Great Waster' campaign right - and it needs to be a campaign with creative YouTube videos and a bank of facts constantly fed to journalists - it won't matter if he continues to steal our best ideas. Noone will believe that he is capable of doing anything half-properly.
The US Democrats recently ran this Halloween video which asked American voters to say which Republican scared them the most. CCHQ could run a competition as to which Brown failure appals them most...